Welcome to OutWrite’s new “From the Archive” series! This series is designed to provide an opportunity to interact with our organization’s archives, assess the opinions and relevance of our past content, and bring that content into the present. In doing so, this series will applaud, critique, and put into conversation ideas of the past with present ideologies and dialogues. Overall, we at OutWrite hope this new series opens up conversations and helps us reconnect with the past while striving for a better future.
*The following article no longer serves to represent the thoughts of the organization today.*
TenPercent Fall 2001: WHY?
The Genesis of LGBTQ2IA: The lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, questioning, intersex, ally continuum | Humor
By Amanda Schapel
In the beginning, before Charles Gilbert Chaddock coined the term “homo-sexuality,” sexuality was a formless void and darkness covered the face of gender, while a wind from God swept over the face of desire.
Then God said, “Let there be lesbians;” and there were lesbians. And God saw that lesbians were good; and God separated the lesbians from the gays. God called the women L, and the men he called G. And there was oral sex and there was anal sex, the first day.
And God said, “Let there be doubts in the midst of the homosexuals, and let it separate the bisexuals from the homosexuals.” God called the doubt B. And there were homosexuals that were “attracted to a person, not a gender” and there were threesomes, the second day.
And God said, “Let all the gender stereotypes under the sky be gathered together into one place, and let the ambiguity appear.” And it was so. God called the miscast women T, and the men that were miscast together he called T. And God saw that it was good. Then God said, “Let the earth put forth surgical options: penile reconstructions yielding seed, and genitals of every kind on earth that feel pleasure with the seed in it.” And it was so. The homosexuals brought forth the vegetation: F-to-Ms yielding bodies of every kind, and M-to-Fs of every kind bearing
breasts with the implants in them. And God saw that it was good. And there were hormones and there was gender satisfaction, the third day.
And God said, “Let there be a name in the midst of the sexualities to separate the heterosexuals from all others; and let it be for G and for L and for F-to-M T and for M-to-F ‘T, and let it be written in the publications of the scholars to shed light upon all queers. And it was so. God made the name Q – the greater Q to rule the scholarly studies and the lesser Q to rule the history books- and the homophobic lingo. God set Q in the midst of the homosexuals to give unity among the LGBTs, to rule over the LGs and over the BTs, and to separate the queers from the heterosexuals, And God saw that it was good. And there was lingguistic irony and there was unity, the fourth day.
And God said, “Let postmodernism bring forth swarms of label rejecters, and let lovers fly above the categorizations in the names of the homosexuals.” So God created the second Q for every intoxicated sorority girl who experiments, of every kind, with which the Greek
system swarms, and every effeminate boy of every kind. And God saw that it was good. God blessed them, saying, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the LGBTQ centers and the counseling
services, and let your Q multiply on the other Q.” And there were LUGs and there were boy bands, the fifth day.
Then God said, “Let us make some humankind in an ambiguous image, with no clear sex; and let them identify outside the stereotypes of the genders, and with new kinds of genitalia, in spite of any quick-judging doctors, and as the I on the LGBTQ21 earth.”
And God said, “Let the earth bring forth homosexual sympathizers of every kind: fag hags and liberal voters and PFLAGgers with ‘I love my gay…’ signs of every kind.” And it
was so. God made the As of the earth for the supporters of every kind, and everyone who accepts the homosexuals of every kind. And God saw that it was good.
So God created LGBTQ2IA in his image, in the image of God he created them; male and female and everywhere in between he created them. God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and confuse it; and have dominion over the fish of the “sea” and over the rainbows of the air and over every living thing that moves upon the sexual continuum.” God said, “See, I have given you every identity yielding desire that is upon the face of all the earth, and every private part with diversity in its potential; you shall have contentment for food. And to every homophobic beast of the earth, and to every sexual prude of the religious order, and to everything that’s creepy on the earth, everything that has the breath of hatred, I have given impassioned bitterness for food.” And it was so. God saw everything that he had made, and indeed, it was very good. ▼
*Commentary and analysis to come*